I have played both the original Postal and Postal 2. I did actually find the original to be a decent time waster for the $5 I spent on it, but the second game was awful. This new game not only looks to keep up that trend, but it looks...well, so much worse.
I can't say I was ever expecting to see anything amazing out of this game or from the guys and gals at Running with Scissors, but this even surprised me with it's suckage. Not only does the video suck, but the man "commentating" and slightly chuckling here are there just makes it so much worse. Just watch the video below and you'll see for yourself.
Starring Kit Ramsey, but not really. Actually this game is a bit fatter and needed to be called Heavy Rain, but it's all good. Heavy Rain is essentially the spiritual successor to Indigo Prophecy, a fantastic adventure game that came out for the PS2, Xbox, and PC.
I have been dying for this game since that initial teaser trailer and rather than hearing me gush about my love for IP and my hopes for Heavy Rain...I think you would be better suited just checking out the video below and reading the preview found at 1UP.
Marc Kusnierz | Wednesday, August 20, 2008 at 3:17PM
Come on, don't think just do it. Time for some news and crap upon other crap. It has been a busy week for me since Saturday. I am tired as balls and losing my mind, so if you read anything a bit...peculiar...you'll know why. On to the news, "That's what she said."
Sony unveils a shit load of more SKUs to confuse everyone once again, including the PSP-3000 and a 160GB PS3 (still no BC). Sony unveils the EyePet and I bet you don't care at all (see, I made a funny). Another snowboarding game has been announced for the 360...but it's not a new SSX. The Tecmo president has chosen to pack his bags and resign. Hurray? I'm sure plenty of other poop happened, but I'm done for now.
Enjoy the Mad World trailer below...and I can really only say one thing about this game: Mad World = AWESOME = F*** you Wii! Why the hell does it have to be on the Wii!?
To read the post on Yuri Lowenthal and sign the petition! All can be found HERE, and why not listen to the interview as well. Back to my usual antics though, I can't just sit and not mention other news out there.
I Am Alive is taking a more realistic approach to Survival games...thanks for telling me something I didn't already know! Gaming + Porn = Fetish!? I do not know, but it is awfully weird and NSFW at all! The FFXIII demo will last for over 2 hours! Though at least an hour and a half of that time is dedicated to cutscenes. Duke Nukem 3D is coming to XBLA, there will be pixelated boobies everywhere, but no sausage. Apparently Everquest I & II will be getting a new expansion pack this fall. Why? I do not know, and I didn't even know people were still playing the first game...was brukaoru even alive when that came out!? (she is a little lady baby).
That's pretty much all I've got for you today...but look forward to seeing Galaga Legions on XBLA Wednesday, and Ratchet and Clank: Quest for Booty on PSN this Thursday. Other than that I just ask that you (if you haven't already) click this LINK and check out the Yuri Lowenthal interview as well as signing the petition found HERE.
Marc Kusnierz | Saturday, August 16, 2008 at 11:07PM
If you don't tell me what's going on, I'm going to kick you straight up the ass! Well there is an interview that will be uploaded tomorrow and some of you may already know who we (Kado) interviewed. If you are not one of the all-knowing then I guess you're just going to sit back and wait like Oprah waiting for her Brunchinner. So I'm speaking of who?...I don't know, so onto the news!
There isn't much to say, not to mention I am exhausted from editing (not finished either). Anyways, here goes...Braid apparently cost Jonathan Blow $180,000 over the entire development. I love the game and I'm not trying to be a douche (not really), but how the hell did he end up spending that much on this one game? ...and I'm sure other crap happened, but I don't care right now. And no, Rock Band 2 is not coming out for the Nintendo 64!
Oh yea...a trailer for The Godfather 2 is live, want to High Five?
...is it just me, or does this game not look too good graphically? Eh?
I think it's that time again. Yes, it is time to go over what has been happening in the world of gaming today. I may be bored, but I am not a whore. You may be real, but that doesn't mean I can feel. Let's get to the friggin' news, before Gus Yoo has to poo.
So what the fizzle-fudge has happened so far today? Not much, but will that stop the sausage from getting the job done? I think not...Akuma has been revealed for SFIV and there is even gameplay footage! Though I could care less since I haven't played a SF game since Super Street Fighter II. Dynasty Warriors 6 will be hitting the PS2/PC and will likely sell millions...on the PS2. Screenshots from the upcoming Batman game have surfaced and they look shockingly good. Screw you, I am shocked like an electrocuted flock (sheep of course). Kotaku still sucks. GTAIV will be blamed for countless crimes in Japan when it finally releases there on October 30th. NCAA 09 takes the top spot for July...I bet a freshly baked Cannolo that Madden will take August. I know I may be sounding crazy there, but I have a hunch. I just feel like that game could sell for some reason. Nvidia also announces something I don't understand, but apparently it will cost a fortune. Well that about wraps up this poop. Why you want poop wrapped up is a completely different question...on to the rest!
Hockey + WOW = NHL 09. That may sound like pure insanity, as if I just did a line of blow on transvestite midget's exposed a$$, but I am completely serious. Imagine playing the "Superstar" mode online with a bunch of other players all doing the same thing. You can be traded, you may get benched, you are essentially just a NHL player on a team. All your teammates are controlled by people across the globe, as well as your enemies! You create your own persona and for hockey fans out there...this is basically as close to living their dream as they're ever going to get. There are so many details to go over that I think you should just read up on them here. It is going to be a great year for hockey fans!
Oh yea, details of the new Godfather game have surfaced and they are...interesting. Now featuring some strategy aspects, called "Don Mode" (aren't they witty and clever and not cliche at all!?). The whole thing seems odd and possibly intriguing, but there really isn't enough for me to personally go on at this moment. To get your fix of Cannoli go here! Sausage OUT!
That's right you little hos, there is more news to talk about and this isn't a trick. Though I know you "people" know all about tricks...and I will not be giving away any blow with this post.
So once again I will go quickly through a few bits of news I could care less about/don't lead to much, or any discussion. Spore went gold. Wow, I really didn't see that happening (really), but not really. X-Blades is a game we should care about? Yea, I don't know what the hell it is either, and honestly I'm perfectly fine with that. A Left 4 Dead X360 demo is "very likely" which is very awesome (quotes not needed). EA and EPIC working on some game together (awesome or disaster? you decide). Ubisoft is getting sued, but guess what...they can afford it so no big deal. Now on to the bigger developments, but probably nothing to go bananas over...yea, I said bananas.
Burnout Paradise will be getting the digital distribution treatment this Autumn, at least on PSN. While I am not, and will never be a supporter of digital distribution. I must say that this game is a perfect game to just have loaded onto your HDD. It's the kind of game that you can just pick up and play for a little bit here and there, which is basically the fundamental design for arcade games. If you want to tango you'll need two people, but that makes no sense. What does make sense is that the game will cost $29.99 when it arrives on PSN later this year.
NBA 2K9. I honestly haven't really paid attention to basketball, or basketball games for a while (last one for me was NBA 2K7). After seeing the teaser for NBA 2K9 I cannot wait to play this game. I know that beauty is supposedly on the inside, but Got Milk (G-rated "God Damn") does the game look gorgeous! I always loved the way the NBA 2K series played, but didn't feel like dropping another $60 last year. If this game's outer beauty is matched with inner beauty (Got Milk that was corny) then I will be pleasantly surprised. Look at this beautiful teaser below. My god it's pretty. I feel pretty, oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and...and *sigh* gay. Well I am pretty happy. Bitch.
Not Much, Lady Touch! If you are confused then I refuse to apologize. This is essentially just a little gaming "news" update with a few items of interest and awesomeness, wrapped by a Sicilian man who doesn't know left from right. You may be asking yourself, "WTF is this guy talking about?" Let me answer with this, "Who gives a shitaki mushroom!? I am awesome."
A Tiger Woods 2009 demo has shown up on XBL and a NHL 2K9 demo is supposed to be up on PSN, but is still M.I.A as of this writing. A sequel to Overlord has been announced for the 360/PS3/PC as well as two other games in that "universe" for the Wii and DS. Did you hear that? That was the sound of no one caring, except for the fact the developer's studio is called "Climax Studios" (I guess they already got there). The Japanese have been going googoo-gaga apeshit crazy for Tales of Vesperia, making it the fastest selling X360 game in Japan. Parents fear games more than alcohol and porn, but I guess that makes sense when the media calls a game like Mass Effect interactive porn...because that's exactly what I got out of that game. Note the obvious sarcasm as I begin to divulge into a few topics that interest me quite heavily. Oh yea, a new Lara Croft model has been chosen. Hurray?
The LittleBigPlanet "Box Art" has been revealed for the UK version (whether it will be the exact same for the US I do not know). I feel really mixed about this cover. I sort of like it, but at the same time there is something about it that just doesn't sit well in my tum tum (that means tummy). I don't know if it's just too busy, but something about it bugs me. Almost like a beetle bugging an Italian girl in Italy, but I digress...
Those retards a few weeks ago saying Castle Crashers would cost an oddly chosen 1800MS points can now eat their own asses, I mean words (yea, words). It has been made official that Castle Crasher will cost 1200MS points! And yes, I think that is a fine and fair price indeedy. If you don't believe me just click this link to see the truth that your Glaucoma kept you from seeing this whole time.
Below is a video of the intro for Mega Man 9. I can't explain the awesome nostalgic feeling that this video tickles my "old man" bones with, but it really is delightful. I am really getting pumped for this game and hope it lives up to the hype that has been building in mind. If you're an old geezer (I may not technically be "old", but I sure feel old) like myself you may get tickled in the same way, but the only way you'll know is if you click play and just "do it". Don't think, just do it. Also, you can find out some info about a few bosses (as well as screens) here.
When cats attack there's not time react. Don't sneeze, play Tenchu. Oh please, God bless you. A kitten of death, way better than the rest. You best be frightened and don't start smiling. This is completely next-gen and something you should send. To all the little ladies and the inhabitants of Hades. This cat will kill us all, worse than a zombie-filled mall. Keep your eyes open, there's no use in hoping. This shit's getting ridiculous, it seems awfully conspicuous. Just sit back and watch the vid, or end up wishing you did...
Marc Kusnierz | 
