Review: The War of the Worlds (XBLA)

The War of the Worlds' greatest accomplishment is bestowing upon me the knowledge that Sir Patrick Stewart should spend the rest of his life narrating most audiobooks; and by most, I mean each and every audiobook from now until the end of time. But as great as Stewart's wonderfully soothing and inviting narration is, it lost a lot of its impact when I heard it eight times in a row due to cheap deaths, or hearing it get cut off in mid-sentence because I passed a very specific point in a level. And if it isn't already obvious, my praising of the game's narration above all else should be rather telling of the overall quality.

The War of the Worlds is, yes, based off the story penned by H.G. Wells and does a particularly good job at creating the morbid atmosphere of this well-known story of an alien invasion. Often, the visuals feature lovely bits of contrast, both literally and figuratively—contrast of colors, light and dark, and life and death. That said, there are moments when the visuals come across muddy and a tad ugly when I took the time to stop and look at them, but most of the time, the game is beautifully stylized and suits the subject matter extremely well.

So we have great narration and mostly beautiful graphics, so why is the score so low? And why am I using the word 'so,' so much? I cannot answer the second question without tangents, but in regards to the first question and as I alluded to earlier, The War of the Worlds is difficult, and not in a challenging, I feel accomplished kind of way. The controls are dated and are reminiscent of the original Prince of Persia (1989), but to add an odd comparison, I believe The War of the Worlds controls exactly like Jurassic Park on the Sega Genesis, which I'd rather play over The War of the World; I mean, at least I could play as a Velociraptor in Jurassic Park.

You: "But I haven't played Prince of Persia or Jurassic Park." Me: "Well, let me break it down." Jerky animation, a need to be standing still to jump and grab a high ledge, and extremely sensitive hit-detection are just a few of the problems. Everything adds up to a horribly unpleasant experience, especially the hit-detection—which seems to encompass slightly more than just the player model. This is a puzzle-platformer that puzzles me with its design (I did just say that), as the puzzles often lack creativity, and only create challenge through poor controls.

Deaths: stupid deaths, cheap deaths, did that really just happen deaths, and so on are scattered throughout the entire game. The main character dies with ease in most cases, though is very capable of fighting off little spider-like alien robots with ease. The War of the Worlds simply isn't enjoyable to play, and that's a rather important aspect when concerning gameplay. On top of all that, the checkpoint system seems completely random or ridiculously specific and resets upon exiting and reentering a level.

The story, though beautifully narrated, lacks the impact I assume it's going for—the game follows the timeline of the 1953 film and goes off on its own adventure of a man looking for his fiancée and brother. I never felt connected to the story or the characters within; and when the game ended, credits rolling, I was filled with indifference and joy from nothing but the realization I no longer had to play the game. There are some well-designed set pieces, but even those fail when I realized just how set in stone they are—I found myself ahead of one set piece and was stuck waiting for it to catch up, while others were so quick to advance that a single misstep brought imminent death, a loading screen, and an immediate retry. Not fun.

The War of the Worlds is a war with frustration and patience, a great representation of war because the game is not enjoyable, just like real war. I can't recommend this game to anyone despite the bright spots, which are few, because the cloud of awful controls and nonsensical checkpoints looms over the entire experience, leaving The War of the Worlds as, simply, a game with potential that never reaches it, a game not worth playing. And I don't want to come across mean, but I would love to slap the person responsible for the 'I Am Arthur Clark' achievement, which is awarded for completing the game in one sitting without dying. Ridiculous.

The War of the Worlds [XBLA] (800MS Points / $10.00)