The Mafia Remake Is a Fresh Coat of Paint on a Car in Need of Heavy Tuning | Attack the Backlog

This episode of Attack the Backlog is all about Mafia, specifically the Definitive Edition, which is a remake of the original game from 2002. Technically, this is a bit of a cheat episode since I did play the original when it came out, but since this is a full-blown remake, I said, "Fuck it, this is my show, and I can do whatever the heck I want," and whatever the heck I did. Regardless of hecks given or taken, the real question is, is Mafia as good today as it was back in the day and, to answer that...

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Metal Tales: Overkill Is Just The Binding of Isaac...but Metal...and Not as Good | FIRST!

Metal Tales: Overkill, for better or worse, is just The Binding of Isaac with a heavy metal filter over it. Does that sound like your jam? Do metal fans even use the word jam? Regardless of whether you jam or jelly, Metal Tales: Overkill does an okay job of mimicking The Binding of Isaac, but mimic Isaac is all it does and, if you ignore the whole metal thing, it's just a poor imitation of a much better game. The only standout are its boss fights, but as good as the boss fights may be, they aren't nearly enough to make up for the rest of the game's shortcomings.

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Wildcat Gun Machine Is More Mild Than Wild | FIRST!

This one hurts. It hurts because I really wanted to love Wildcat Gun Machine (and was so sure I would). The art is great and the setup is even better–I love twin-stick shooters, bullet hell or not, and I love dungeon crawlers–so how could it possibly go wrong? Sadly, things did go wrong thanks to the game being too easy to make anyone ever confuse it with a "real" bullet hell game and, because of this, it failed to make much of an impression, leaving me with no desire to continue playing after beating the first area and dabbling in the second. I may return one day, but, like the bullets in Wildcat Gun Machine, I'm not in any rush.

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The Perils of Baking Are Anything but Super | FIRST!

Super Perils of Baking is a remake of the 2018 platformer, Perils of Baking. As someone who's only played the remake and has zero experience with the original, I'm left wondering why this game deserved the remake treatment. Is Perils of Baking actually good? Was something lost in translation as it made the jump to 16-bits? I like platformers and have enjoyed many over the years, but Super Perils of Baking is not one of them; it's the kind of game I wouldn't even recommend if it was free on Game Pass.

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If You Like Jank, RICO: London Will Gladly Accept Your Thanks | FIRST!

RICO: London is not a good game. The shooting and visuals are just okay, there are bugs and performance issues throughout, and the gameplay is incredibly repetitive; however, despite or because of all this, it's a surprisingly good time. It may seem weird to shit on a game only to follow said shitting with, "But it's a good time," but to try and act like I didn't have fun playing RICO: London would be a lie. All that said, I still wouldn't recommend the game to anyone because one's tolerance for jank varies wildly from person to person and, with a price tag of $50 (at least on Xbox), it's way too expensive for what you get. As it currently stands, RICO: London is good dumb fun, but even if you love good dumb fun, be smart and wait for a sale on this one.

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The Last of Us Remains One of the Greatest Stories Ever Told in Gaming | Second Runs

"What the hell? This isn't Attack the Backlog! I demand a refund!" I'm sure at least none of you are saying that, but maybe one of you is thinking that and, well, this is a long time coming. Second Runs is a series I've been wanting to start for years--as made apparent in this episode--and I figured Father's Day was the perfect day to make it happen, especially since the first episode is all about The Last of Us. To keep things short, Second Runs is a series all about replaying games I loved back in the day to see if I still love them today. The plan, moving forward, is to alternate episodes of Attack the Backlog and Seconds Runs; however, I can't guarantee that'll happen right away, so no promises just yet. But that's enough about that, so here's to starting new things, here's to hoping you enjoy this inaugural episode, and here's to each and every father out there--you are so much more important than you'll ever know and I hope your Father's Day is just as wonderful as you are.

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I Charge Gravitar: Recharged With the Crime of Being a Good Time | FIRST!

Prior to this recharging, I had never played Gravitar before--I'm not even sure if I've heard of it before--but that's all changed now and, much to my surprise, I really enjoyed my time. Of all the classic Atari games to receive the "Recharged" treatment, Gravitar is easily my favorite of the bunch. It may in part be because it's entirely new to me, but that didn't do Black Widow any favors, so it's more than just that; Gravitar is just a very interesting game and one worthy of your time whether you've played the original or not. Touché, Atari, touché.

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If You Like The Revenge of Shinobi, You're Gonna Like Ganryu 2 | FIRST!

The Revenge of Shinobi is one of my favorite Genesis games, so when I booted up Ganryu 2 and realized it was basically just The Revenge of Shinobi, I went from six to midnight faster than when I've got a fresh bowl of oatmeal sitting in front of me. From the visuals to the music and, most importantly, the gameplay, every aspect of Ganryu 2 knocks it out of the park, making it one of the best games I've played so far this year. Maybe it'll get super repetitive or cheap or do something to ruin my love as I keep playing, but as far as my first impression goes, I can't recommend Ganryu 2 highly enough. 

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Cloudy With a Chace of Loot Showers: A Loot River Preview | FIRST!

Loot River is yet another action roguelike...except it isn't; by letting you manipulate the ground you walk on, allowing you to reach places you otherwise wouldn't, Loot River creates an identity all to its own. It's a neat mechanic and makes Loot River stand out in a very crowded genre. The problem is, once the excitement of this unique mechanic dissipates, the truth reveals itself: Loot River really is just another action roguelike; it's not a bad game by any means, but it's not particularly special, either, with average combat, okay visuals, and a few enemy designs that lean more on the annoying side than the challenging side. When the rest of the game is okay at best, one unique mechanic just isn't enough to warrant one's time. 

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The Episode Where I Get on Every Visual Novel Fan's Bad Side: A Vengeful Heart Preview | FIRST!

I apologize in advance to all visual novel fans for what you're about to endure. Vengeful Heart is maybe the worst visual novel I've ever "played." It is everything I hate about visual novels. There are no choices to be made, no mini-games to be played, and nothing to do but read, read, and read some more. What makes it even worse is that the accompanying visuals are so worthless that not even those add anything to the story, leading to the only question I had during my entire time with Vengeful Heart: Why is this a video game? Unlike most visual novels I've played (and usually not enjoyed), Vengeful Heart doesn't have an answer. Now, I know visual novel fans will disagree and that's fine, but I will never understand how someone could prefer consuming a solely written story by reading it on a TV instead of a tablet or similar device, but such is life, eh. 

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